i feel a poem coming on...

wrote this today: "whatever happens will happen, and what is meant to be will be, and no matter the outcome of the next few weeks, I am okay with the answers." felt a song/poem coming on...

Wait and See

it's been a long, long road
with twists and turns and pain
i believed with all my heart
that i'd never find love again

then he waltzed through the door
and quickly changed my mind
made me believe naively
it was true love that i'd find

our lives were thrown together
our love for all to see
but it wasn't long before i found
he wasn't in love with me

and since the ending of our "love"
i came to realize
that everything that he was not
i found in another's eyes

real or unrequited,
true or just a phase,
i found a smile that touched my heart
when i thought upon his gaze.

whatever happens will happen,
and what is meant to be will be,
and no matter the outcome
i am okay with the answers,
i will wait and see.
  • Current Mood
    artistic artistic

fishing for inspiration

i see people on the bus every day with their headphones in, presumably listening to music, yet unaffected by it. how can they do that? how can you have music SO CLOSE to your braincells and NOT be physically affected by it? i don't get it! when i hear music, no matter the kind, it causes a reaction in me. it either makes me dance, makes me sing, or makes me close my eyes and let go...

Dan Fogelberg's music *always* makes me sing.
Dance Music - Every Day I'm Shufflin'; Please Don't Stop the Music; All Summer Long; Shout - all make me want to dance (and as such are great for walking from the building to the car)
The Awakening, The Rutter 23rd Psalm, Theme from Schindlers List all make me close my eyes, cry, sing along, something.... i FEEL the music.

Why can't other people?! Do they hold back because they don't think it's cool? do they just take all the hard work that goes into their music for granted and listen passively as if it were the teacher character from Charlie Brown? Does it mean anything to them? I just want to grab them and shake them and say BE AFFECTED!!

there's a poem here somewhere.


for those of you following along at home, there is a story i've been working on for quite some time now, that is rapidly unfolding into more of a novel than a short story.

here is the first part of it. suggestions, comments, thoughts welcome. random dates in the middle are my notes (if i missed any) and I haven't settled on a name for the main character female yet. it's long, possibly two chapters or so. :)

*edit 9/15/11* opening to the public... it will be worked on some more, but process is a part of that, and feedback is part of the process.*/edit*

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  • Current Mood
    cold cold


upon their lips remains a kiss
'goodnight,' he says, his eyes in bliss
'goodnight,' she says and drives away
to face again another day.

then thoughts entrap her mind again
how soon will this come to an end?
she drives, an island of her own
while winter seals her heart of stone



May the road rise up to meet you. (inspriation)

The road rises, the sun sets.
The stars shine on all the earth.
The moon has hidden away.

The world rests, alseep at night,
The animals, birds, and men
And all alone, I am awake.

No sleep for me, no reprieve
No gentle slumbers or rest
I am the night, the dark, unknown.

a thought on the same page:
I wandered down an empty path. I didn't know where it ended, but I knew where it began.
  • Current Music
    Loreena Mckennitt - The Mystic's Dream

(no subject)

screaming in silence
hoping the violence
will pass me by

screaming in silence
hoping my defense
will hold

silently screaming
outwardly beaming
waiting for you

silently screaming
wishing and dreaming
for that day to come

screaming in silence
without you.

not mutually exclusive



in love with her
obsession without.